Coaches- One of the things that makes America great

Not THAT type of coach, silly!

Sad happenings this week in Vegas, and sad to see the fallout discussions. I have my own opinions on gun control and stuff, but so what. Opining on that topic divides. I read that there were 88k deaths related to alcohol use last year in the US. Where is the outrage there? And does anyone now care about who takes a knee?

It is too easy to focus on things that suck, so I would like to focus just a bit on one of the things that makes this country great.  There are many, (those serving in PTAs, charities, churches, local agencies, etc.) but today I am talking about coaches.

Go to any soccer field across this fruited plain, and you will see SUVs, minivans, popup tents, umbrellas, coolers full of water bottles and orange wedges . . . but the common thread that holds everything together are coaches. Hundreds of thousands leave work early and spend countless hours to invest in kids. I love those guys.

I coached football for a year, the Camarillo Cougars' 8th grade level team. My old high school friend Matt Hickman pulled me aside, and wisely counseled, "John, when Jake gets older, you are going to coach him, right? Well, you don't want to be a rookie coach. Why don't you come out and cut your teeth on other peoples' kids this year with the Cougars?"

Sounded like sound logic to me. But after four months of 4 nights a week and all day every Saturday, I realized the commitment. And it wasn't just time, I felt dedicated to give my very best effort to these 45 or 50 boys, who felt like my sons. I think the worst day of my life was when we lost our 2nd round playoff game. That was in 2007, and I have to admit to still feeling sick about it. Watching Matty Hickman refuse to be tackled, and Tony Johnson break a finger but still continuing to play, are indelibly imprinted in my mind. And heart.

I came to understand something too. Coaching makes you crazy. It may be temporary insanity, but there were times I wanted to put a contract on those guys in stripes.

Over the years I have seen a lot of great things from coaches. Here are a few that stick out.

Carl Thompson- don't let the smile fool you!

Carl Thompson- my high school football coach. We won CIF at the LA Coliseum against a team that sent over a dozen to play in college, and two to the NFL. They scored the first 14 points, we scored the last 16. (I will never forget watching us convert on 4th and goal from the 9 with less than 3 minutes left in the game.) The other team had more yards, more first downs, greater time of possession, etc. They dominated in the stats, (except one!) and there was a bit of sour grapes from their coach in the paper. Coach Thompson met with us during the week after the game and told us not to pay attention to that garbage, that we were the champs, and no one can ever take that away from us. The dude was pretty tough, but at that moment, he was a fatherly figure to us.

Anonymous coach- there are rules in college sports, but some of them seem overly austere. My buddy's kid was away at college to wrestle, (and probably study too!), and was struggling to make ends meet as many of us did while in college. Coaches are limited by rules on what help they can give, but my friend's kid was home in his apartment and he received a visit from his coach, who had an armful of groceries for him. From what I hear, this isn't a rare thing, but sure does indicate the emotional investment made in these kids. My buddy often said that his boy would take a bullet for that coach.

Joe Rios, a class act, great coach, and one of by best friends. Hundreds of his athletes were at his funeral. 

Bobby Douglas- his Iowa State heavyweight was wrestling against the top ranked Iowa wrestler at the NCAAs, and the Iowa kid hurt him with an illegal move. It wasn't malicious, he just took a hold beyond its range of motion. It happens. If Bobby's kid couldn't continue, then he would be awarded the match, disqualifying the Iowa kid. Bobby was not matside, but his kid was being coached by Bobby's assistant coaches. When it appeared his kid would not be able to continue the match, Bobby ran across the mats to where his kid was and told the ref that his kid would not accept a win that way. So his kid got up with his injured wing, went to the center of the mat, and stood across from the Iowa kid. The ref blew the whistle to start the clock, then blew it again to stop the clock, and Bobby defaulted the match. The Iowa kid ended up winning the national championship, but what I saw from Bobby Douglas was a lesson in class.

Brad Penrith- best example of coaching a ref. I was officiating his kid from Northern Iowa University at the NCAA D1 West Region. His kid was on top riding, and Brad calmly said to me from his corner, "You're gonna miss the points if you don't get over here." I scooted on over, and his kid then hit a tilt going an unexpected way, and I would have totally missed it. Well, not totally, I would have gotten there in time for a one-count, but you need a two-count to get points, and he barely had the two-count before the bottom kid rolled out of danger. At that moment I got some insight on the partnership a coach and ref could have, not to anyone's advantage, but to ensure a safe and fair contest.

Coach Dave Pacheco doing what coaches do, and getting more than most coaches get.

Coaching is a funny thing. Those guys put their hearts and souls into kids. There were a couple colleges in California where the coaches didn't like me as a referee, and honestly felt like their kid was going to get hosed with me on the whistle. I considered quitting over it. I didn't want any coach to believe their kids were going to be mistreated by me. I ultimately decided it was their issue more than mine, to avoid their kids if possible at tournaments, and to realize that probably every coach has a ref on his list.

I am amazed at the good coaches do, and this country has an army of them who help kids learn responsibility, build grit, develop skills, build character, and yep . . . pay if forward. America would be a different place without these wonderful coaches- God bless 'em all.